Bridezilla, bridezilla, BRIDEZILLA! Those of us who are happily married here at TeamWED feel for today’s bride who has been overexposed to the idea of the bridezilla. She is afraid to speak up, afraid to ask for what she wants or to demand that a vendor contract be fulfilled lest she be dubbed a *gasp* bridezilla. Oh, you see the television shows with the catty girls who demand that their bridesmaids all get boob jobs, but those chicks are on reality TV shows because they’re the outliers, not the norm.
Trust us when we say that the bridezilla is a truly rare beast outside of the realm of the WE channel. But that hasn’t stopped a mythology from growing up around the bridezilla! And unfortunately, that mythology has had what we see as a negative effect on the poor brides who fear that making even the tiniest demand will make them seem unreasonable. While we wouldn’t recommend that you ask your maid-of-honor to dye her hair in preparation for your wedding, there’s nothing wrong with requesting (or even demanding) that your gal pals all order their bridesmaid dresses on time so you can be sure they’ll have them in time.
What else can you safely do without being branded a bridezilla? How about:
- Ask your wedding vendors for thorough contracts that outline the services they will provide and the prices they will charge.
- Refuse to work with any wedding vendor who won’t draw up a wedding vendor contract.
- Tell the sales woman at the bridal salon that you would like to purchase the wedding dress you love, not the wedding dress that *she* thinks looks best on you.
- Let your future mother-in-law know that she’s smothering you when she demands to accompany you on all wedding-related shopping trips.
- Tell your mom and dad that even though you respect their religious convictions, you won’t be getting married in their house of worship.
- Demand that your florist provide you with the color of flowers that you requested, not a close substitute. The same goes for your caterer and the food, your baker and the cake, etc.
- Give your groom’s best bud a piece of your mind when he makes an inappropriately ribald toast at the rehearsal dinner.
- Safely skip save-the-dates, wedding favors, assigned seating, and other non-essentials that most wedding magazines will tell you are necessary to a perfect wedding.
- Wear black. Or pants. Or bright pink. Anything but a big white wedding gown.
- Carry something other than a bridal bouquet, like a prayer book, a candle… or nothing at all! There’s no rule stating you have to walk down the aisle with something in your hands.
- Tell your dad that even though he wants to escort you to the altar, you’d prefer to walk alone since you’ve been an independent adult for years and years. (The same goes for the daughter-dad dance.)
- Recite unusual vows or vows you write yourself instead of the same old vows you hear in every movie and television show. In most places, there is no set wording you must repeat to be legally married.
- Serve sweets other than cake at the reception. How about a sundae bar or a fruit and cheese spread or milk and cookies?
- Skip the booze in favor of non-alcoholic beverages.
OR ALMOST ANYTHING ELSE. Seriously, ladies. As long as what you’re planning is legal and in keeping with good taste (up to a point) you shouldn’t be afraid to have the wedding you want to have just because you’re afraid that some old biddy will call you a bridezilla. Especially if you’re paying for some or all of your wedding!
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