Daily Wedding Planning Tip » Engaged Now What

Engagement Length: Do What’s Best For You!

TeamWED — Sun, 12 Sep 2010 13:42:46 +0000

The average engagement lasts for a year or more, but some couples are only engaged for months before getting married while others wait for a decade before tying the knot. Your engagement should last for as long as you and your intended want it to last.

How do you decide how long your engagement should be? Your decision can be based on many factors: your financial situation, the demands of your jobs, your culture, and personal taste.

Don’t let anyone tell you how long or short your engagement should be. Even if family members or friends pressure you to wait or rush the wedding, don’t listen. The decision should be yours and your fiancé or fiancée’s alone.

Keep in mind that engagement lengths can be determined by cultural standards. In some cultures, short engagements (e.g., a few days) are typical. If your cultural beliefs are important to you, follow those guidelines when choosing the length of your engagement.

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Don’t Forget to Write Down Your Wedding Engagement Date

TeamWED — Sat, 11 Sep 2010 18:41:41 +0000

Engaged, Now What?

Wedding Planning Advice from Daily Wedding Planning Tip

Don’t forget to write down the date of your engagement in your journal or scrapbook or on your calendar. You may not celebrate it every year, but the anniversary of your engagement will always be a special day to remember.

Think about your engagement as a time to grow closer to your fiancé or fiancée as opposed to a months long to-do list. Adopting a positive perspective now will ensure you enjoy planning your wedding together, which will strengthen your bond and thus your marriage.

The early days of your engagement (i.e., before you start seriously planning the wedding) are the best time to start talking about your and your spouse-to-be’s likes and dislikes. Maybe you hate cake and your sweetie hates the Chicken Dance – knowledge is wedding planning power.

Make this time about you and your fiancé or fiancée, not the wedding. You’ll spend months planning your wedding, but years with each other. Don’t rush into your wedding planning to-do list. Enjoy being engaged, since hopefully you’ll only be doing it once!

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Relax and Enjoy Your Wedding Engagement

TeamWED — Sat, 11 Sep 2010 18:36:59 +0000

Engaged, Now What?

Wedding Planning Advice from Daily Wedding Planning Tip

The first thing you need to do once you slip on your engagement ring is relax. That may be hard to do because you’re so excited, but if you jump headfirst into wedding planning without taking a moment to enjoy your engagement, you’ll burn yourself out.

You may want to call up everyone in your address book to share the good news, but consider waiting a day or two. This is a very special time in your life! Savor the bliss you’re feeling right now by celebrating privately with your spouse-to-be.

If your fiancé or fiancée proposed without a ring or you didn’t want an engagement ring, don’t stress about what other people will think. The same goes if you prefer silver and onyx to gold and diamonds.

Lots of women don’t even end up wearing their engagement rings after the wedding. Let people think what they want to think if you’d prefer to wear a wedding band and nothing else.

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Wedding Planning Timelines Are Important Even For Short Engagements

TeamWED — Mon, 28 Dec 2009 12:21:09 +0000

Your wedding planning timeline will change based on how long your engagement will be, but there are free wedding planning timelines and checklists online for engagements of all durations. There are, of course, some tasks that need to be completed before others on any wedding planning timeline, like choosing the wedding date and venue, while some tasks can wait, like buying gifts for your attendants.

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Happy Thanksgiving From All of Us at TeamWED!

TeamWED — Thu, 26 Nov 2009 10:08:29 +0000

All of us here at TeamWED hope our readers, brides-to-be and former brides alike, all have the happiest and most wonderful Thanksgiving. And for those who are participating in or hosting Thanksgiving weddings on this day of feasting, congratulations!

(Photo via)

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Wedding Colors: Gray and Red

TeamWED — Thu, 29 Oct 2009 05:54:35 +0000

If you’re looking for a mature and sophisticated wedding color palette, consider gray and red. It’s an unusual choice, to be sure, but also a very modern and hip one. Making it work is easy. How about beautiful gray bridesmaids’ dresses paired with bridesmaids’ bouquets made of deep red roses? The bridal bouquet can use the same roses but incorporate a gray ribbon to coordinate with the bridesmaids. The bride might even wear red, if she’s daring enough! The menswear for a gray and red wedding is a no-brainer. Pair gray on gray suits or tuxedos with red boutonnieres (please stay away from red vests, however, lest the groom be mistaken for a waiter or someone’s prom date). A while wedding cake might feature red and gray icing details or red flowers with silver candies. And as far as reception decor goes, the possibilities are endless!

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Paying For a Wedding — By Yourself

TeamWED — Tue, 20 Oct 2009 18:15:27 +0000

What is the one thing that diminishes the excitement of the engagement period more than anything else? Money, of course. Paying for a wedding is tough, especially these days when it’s no longer clear who pays for the wedding reception, the rehearsal dinner, the bridal gown, and everything else brides and grooms need to make their wedding day perfect. The wedding statistics tell an interesting story, which is that more and more, brides and grooms are shouldering at least part of the bill, usually with help from their parents or other relatives.

Let’s say you’re a bride or a groom who falls into the minority of couples who are paying for their own weddings in the entirety AND you’re like most couples in that you don’t exactly have $20,000 just sitting around in a savings account. What can you do? While you’ll ultimately have to answer that question on your own, here are some suggestions that may help you have the wedding you really want when you’re footing the bill.

Long Engagements

Saving for a wedding may suck (and take a long time depending) but imagine how cool it will feel to pay for a wedding yourself without using credit or scrimping on what matters to you. Long engagements let couples accrue the cash is takes to pay for all those high-end wedding favors.

Bartering Brides

The cool new way to pay for a wedding involves the oldest of financial transactions, bartering. If you or your spouse-to-be have a skill to share, why not see if you can exchange it for vendor services? Maybe a wedding cake baker needs a website made or the catering hall needs flyers designed. Even housecleaning and repairs can be exchanges for wedding vendor services, so brainstorm what you have to barter!

Charge It

Yes, you can pay for a wedding using a credit card, but DO NOT DO IT. I repeat, do not pay for a wedding using a credit card. The interest will be astronomical. You’ll be paying it off forever if your wedding even if your wedding costs less than the average wedding. And taking on massive amounts of consumer debt is no way to start a marriage.

Wedding Loans

Wedding loans are just what you think they are, and while they can be useful, they’re basically no different from any other bank loan. We recommend shying away from this option, though if you’re going to borrow money to pay for a wedding, better that you do it via a proper bank. That said, see my above comment about debt.

Elope

It’s not the perfect solution, but it is the easiest one. Go to the courthouse, spend $45, and *bam* you’re hitched. Most parents and loved ones hate this option, but you can always throw a party later on to celebrate your new marriage. And, hey, what’s a little stink eye from relatives compared with starting married life debt free?

Remember, too, that there’s nothing wrong with having a smaller wedding, getting married on Friday or Sunday, cutting the guest list, or sticking to a tight budget. But if you want the wedding you want on your dime, the above tips can help!

Photo by bp6316 is off to Denver

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Where To Elope

TeamWED — Sun, 28 Jun 2009 18:11:21 +0000

Recently we wrote about the reasons to elope vs a traditional wedding. Today, we’ll want to talk about where to elope.

The place you elope can be a conveniently close resort or an exotic location you’ve always wanted to see. In fact, you can elope and have your honeymoon in the same place.

There are several search engines that supply elopement locations. Try www.letsrunoff.com or a simple search on Google.

Popular Elopement Location #1

Las Vegas has to be the most famous location for eloping couples. They have fabulous hotels, and overabundance of chapels, and it’s a great vacation spot to boot. Maybe you and your soon-to-be spouse can win a little cash while you’re out there, too.

Popular Elopement Location #2

A courthouse in your city is probably the cheapest place to elope. There aren’t any travel costs and it’s usually easy to schedule. Plus, if you have family in the area and you want to let them come to witness it, you can, which prevents everyone from feeling left out.

Popular Elopement Location #3

Try eloping on a cruise ship. Some offer weddings, or you could plan to have your wedding in one of the ports you stop in.

Popular Elopement Location #4

Resorts are always a great place to elope to. You can find them in many warm, exotic locations like the Caribbean. You’ll have a beautiful and intimate wedding at any of these locations.

Popular Elopement Location #5

Niagara Falls is another famous spot to elope to. It borders the U.S. and Canada, and has a lovely location, so you’ll have a beautiful wedding and can travel out of the country at the same time.

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10 Reasons To Elope

TeamWED — Sun, 28 Jun 2009 18:05:39 +0000

Thinking of an alternative to a traditional wedding?

Why not Elope?

Eloping is an affordable alternative to having a big wedding. It’s also easy, pressure free, and can be exciting. Sharing a day with just your fiancé and committing to your marriage is something special.

Reason to Elope #1: Intimacy

Big weddings can take the intimacy out of a ceremony because you have to focus on so many people beside yourselves. When a couple spends time, effort, and money entertaining their guests, they lose a little bit of intimacy in the ceremony. If you aren’t up for declaring your love in front of hundreds of people, then elopement may be for you.

Reason to Elope #2: Money

Weddings can be expensive. If you’re unwilling to fork over the cash for friends and family to eat, drink, and be merry, then eloping may be for you. Your only expenses will be those you spend on yourselves. Plus, you can save the money you would’ve spent on a wedding and use it to do something more meaningful, like put a down payment on a house.

Reason to Elope #3 : Less Stress

Planning a wedding can be extremely stressful. You have to worry about who you are or aren’t inviting, where to hold the wedding, how to dress the bridal party, what decorations to include, what caterer to hire, etc. If you elope, you don’t have to worry about any of it. You just go to your wedding, have the ceremony, eat the food the two of you want to eat, and celebrate in a manner you see fit.

Reason to Elope #4 : Family Issues

There are many family issues that could make a wedding stressful. For instance, if the bride’s parents are divorced and hostile to each other, who do you invite to the wedding? How do you keep the feuding parents apart if you invite them both? Perhaps you live too far away from your family to have a traditional wedding. Elopement solves all of these types of issues.

Reason to Elope #5 : Religion or Culture

If the two of you were raised in different religious or cultures, your families may have a hard time finding a way to blend your wedding ceremonies together. Or perhaps one family is not receptive of the other’s traditions. Either way, elopement avoids these sticky situations.

Reason to Elope #6 : You Want to Get Married Right Away

Wedding planning takes time and you have to find a venue with availability on the date you desire. Sometimes this is impossible. If you want to get married right away, elopement is the answer.

Reason to Elope # 7 : This Isn’t Your First Marriage

If you’ve had the big ceremony before and it didn’t work out, you might not want to go through it again. In this case, elopement is definitely the answer.

Reason to Elope #8 : You Hate Large Weddings

Not everyone is comfortable with a large wedding, but sometimes it’s hard to avoid. How do you invite some family members and friends and not others? How do you keep your guest list to a minimum? The answer: elope. That way, your wedding only has a few people.

Reason to Elope #9 : You Put Your Relationship Before Tradition

Some couples get swept up in the tradition of marriage, while others realize it’s the relationship that matters, not the ceremony. For couples like this, then elopement is a good option because you avoid worrying about tradition.

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Engaged Now What Engagement Party Planning (Part Two)

TeamWED — Wed, 20 May 2009 21:27:17 +0000

Engaged Now What Engagement Party Planning (Part Two)

11. How Much Should it Cost?

The issue of cost is one the two of you will have to work out together. Truthfully, it depends on your budget. There are many ways to save money when throwing an engagement party. To save money, you will have to do more work yourself, though. So, it becomes a balance between costs and labor. How much do you want to spend? How much do you want to do?

12. What do You Need to Order or Make?

An engagement party usually requires some type of food and drink. You can splurge on decorations or party favors, if you wish, but most people are content with just the basics. The type of food and drink is up to you, and will largely depend on your budget. Also, you may want to send out printed invitations, perhaps as a method of both announcing your engagement and inviting guests, but a simple telephone invite will also work and will save time and money.

13. Ways of Lowering Costs

To lower costs hold your engagement party at a family member or friend’s house. Provide hors d’Oeuvres and champagne instead of full course meals and fancy cocktails. Invite guests via the telephone instead of paying postage to mail invitations. Having a smaller party is always a good idea, too. You can also ask guests to bring something small for a potluck dinner so you don’t have to provide everything.

14. Deciding Who to Invite

Deciding who to invite can be problematic. You don’t want to invite someone to your engagement party who you won’t want to invite to the wedding. Also, if you limit the attendance to your party, you run the risk of leaving someone out. It’s hard to invite one friend without the other. A simple way to restrict the guest list is to limit it to family only so no feelings are hurt. Or, you can limit it to friends and family who live near you.

15. When to Hold Your Engagement Party

The engagement party is traditionally held one to three months after the engagement. If you are going to wait a year or two before the wedding, you can throw your party later. If you are having a short engagement (less than six months), it is wise to skip the engagement party and just plan your wedding reception.

16. What About Gifts?

Gifts are not a part of your engagement party, and as such you shouldn’t expect them. The engagement party is meant for you to celebrate with friends and family, not to receive anything from them. However, some guests may ask you what you want. Be sure to tell them that gifts are not necessary, but you may want to register for a few small items in case someone insists on bringing something.

17. Registering for Gifts

Register for small items for your engagement party. Do not put anything overly expensive on the list. Make sure to alert any guests who mention that they want to bring gifts where you are registered. However, do not place your registration on invites, as it may make guests feel obligated to buy you something.

18. Alternative Gifts

Another nice way to handle the gift-giving problem is to not register at all, but to ask guests who insist on buying something to donate to a charity in your name. You can do this by informing any guests who inquire about gifts which charity you’d like to donate to. This way, you don’t have to handle gifts at your party and you’ve done something good for the community.

19. Handling Gifts at the Party

Place gifts in a separate room where guests won’t notice them. Gifts are not meant to be the focus of the engagement party. If guests notice a pile of gifts, they may feel guilty if they haven’t purchased one for you. On the same note, do not open the gifts at your party. You can thank those guests who did bring gifts privately by speaking to them individually and sending thank you cards.

20. Sending Thank You Notes

Thank you notes are an important part of any occasion. They show that you are a gracious host and are appreciative of the gifts and the guests who gave them. Purchase thank you cards printed on a high quality paper and hand write each one, individually tailoring it to each person. Put in a personal note, even if it’s just mentioning what gift they gave you, to show the recipient that the thank you was written specifically for them.

21. Simple Touches to Personalize Your Engagement Party

Some couples like to personalize their party. One easy way to do this is to get monogrammed napkins or serve M&M’s with your initials on them (you can purchase them custom made on the M&M’s website: www.m-ms.com). If you know the date of your wedding when you throw your engagement party, you might want to hand deliver the wedding invitations to your guests during the party. Using table cloths or other decorations with the wedding colors also adds a nice touch.

22. Time Management When Planning Your Engagement Party

Though you want to take some time and celebrate your engagement, you don’t want to focus entirely on planning your engagement party and completely forget to plan your wedding. Especially if your engagement party is a few months into your engagement. Time is precious, and you don’t want to leave the wedding planning to the last minute, so time management is key.

23. Balancing Your Planning Time

While planning your engagement party, you may want to think of big things, like where you want to hold your ceremony or what colors you want to use in your wedding decorations. If you figure these basics out, you can incorporate the ideas into your engagement party, too, as mentioned before. But, early on, you don’t need to plan the intricacies of your ceremony or pick out cakes. Take care of the basics first and enjoy your engagement party before you move on to the details.

24. One Unique Touch Every Engagement Party Should Have

When you get engaged, people always ask the same question: how did he propose? You should expect people to ask this at your engagement party if they haven’t already heard the story. So, it might be nice to write down your story and print it out so people can read. You can also save the story page to include in your wedding album.

25. Take Photos at Your Party

One thing couples often forget in all the excitement of the engagement party is to take pictures. An easy way to solve this problem is to ask a friend or family member to take the pictures for you. Give them a camera and let them know they are in charge of picture taking for the night, if they are willing. This way, you will have photos to commemorate your wonderful party.

Engaged Now What (Part One)

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